I am making sure to keep my skills up to par (just in case Mr. Right comes along)
I have a personal theory about why nerds make good partners. Besides the obvious (assumed) reasons -- they are smart, they will be loyal, they probably will make good money -- my theory that nerds make good partners is based solely on the notion that nerds know that they are nerds. The bad boy and the player... know that they are attractive. They work diligently to look great, to be smooth talkers and to dress the part. The drive the right cars (or motorcycles) and they tend to have this delicious swag that makes you catch your breath when they pass you by. For those guys, the work goes into the appearance.
Nerds are different. Nerds know that they aren't the fly-est guy in the spot. Nerds are naturally inquisitive and they tend to be studious. They apply the same enthusiasm they have for a new subject to someone they are interested in. They learn you. From head to toe, inside out... they figure out what you like, what makes you smile and they work to perfect those transitions so that even if they aren't the fly-est guy, they know that they can make you happy.
I've also learned, that nerds tend to apply that same fastidiousness to their sex lives.
*eye brow raised*
Yep, I'm telling y'all the truth right now -- so take notes.
Next time you're hanging over your favorite nerd's house, check out his library. If he's really a true nerd... somewhere in there (might be hidden from view) there are books, videos and other tutorial aids that will help him figure out how to get YOU where you want to go. I promise... they are there!
Ever hooked up with a guy that you weren't completely sure about? He was nice... but something was sort of missing? And then, he kissed you, or he brought you your favorite flowers, took you to your favorite restaurant... complimented your new lipstick, hairdo... something small but it was powerful? He may have complimented you with a sincerity that made you blush. And if you stuck around with that nerd, perhaps... he blew your socks off when you got to the bedroom. You were sitting there, curled in a fetal position with your thumb in your mouth trying to figure out when Clark Kent turned into Superman?
(sigh) Yep. I've been there. *That's why I like nerds*
So... for the nerdy girls out there -- although with girls, it's not usually that we're nerds as much as we're stuck in the "good girl" zone. Personally, I think that whole damn term "good girl" needs to die. Like now. At any rate... if you're stuck in the good girl zone... and you're wondering how it is that so many chicks just seem to naturally connect with their inner sex-pot... well, you need to pick up this book.
Clark Kent was Superman.
**Note: Nerds and shy guys are not the same thing. A nerd can be outgoing or shy... if you've got a shy nerd on your hands, you might have to work a little bit harder to get him out of his shell. Personally, I don't date shy men. It is too frustrating for me. But, plenty of my friends are shy and date shy guys... so don't discount the shy fellow. Just find a way to connect with him and watch him blossom under your attention. **
Bad girls feel good about being bad
Bad girls have sex on the brain
Bad girls dress the part
Bad girls walk the walk
Bad girls know how to talk sexy, in and out of bed
Bad girls know their bodies
Bad girls touch and tease
Bad girls love to climax
Bad girls play with toys
Bad girls break all the rules
I'm telling you... it's a good book. I am currently trying to figure one thing out... and when I do... watchoutdernow!
While I was in active treatment, I made sure to be clear with my medical team that my sexual life was important. There are a lot of stories on the internet about other survivors and their struggles with intimacy. So many reasons can be blamed... medication, lowered self-esteem, body image issues, relationship problems, painful intercourse, etc. I'm fortunate that I haven't had any physical issues to contend with and I'm constantly working on my emotional issues about my body. Sex, good sex... is too good to lose out on for the rest of my life.